Responsibility has an unduly bad reputation in our society. It is often mistakenly associated with blame and pointing fingers. In fact, it is a very empowering notion. Sigmund Freud said, “Most people do not really want freedom, because freedom involves responsibility, and most people are frightened of responsibility.” Taking responsibility for your life is the first step for any change.
While we are thinking that someone or something else is responsible for circumstances that occurred in our lives, any progress is out of question. If I believe that something external controls how I feel, I’m giving away my power to that all-powerful something. It is literally disempowering. As long as I believe so, I will stay in a position of a victim, where anything can happen to me against my will. I can get angry because someone didn’t show up on time. I can get irritated because I had to wait in traffic for an hour. I can get upset because I work with people, who don’t understand and don’t appreciate me. There are many versions of this miserable scenario.
Even though we are used to thinking that way and rehearsed it very well, this is a position that is very far from reality and from the realization of our own power to choose any reaction to any situation. While we keep complaining and crying over spilled milk, life is quietly passing by and we keep wasting precious opportunities for growth. Opportunities for change are always there, but they assume that we are at least open for them instead of being stuck in self-pity. This is not to blame anyone, because it is a learned habit. But we can make another choice. Do we want something new or do we enjoy swimming in the ocean of complains and self-pity? I think the choice is easy! Both options are available to us at every moment in time. The question is: “What do I choose right now?”
In the book “Way of The Peaceful Warrior,” Dan Millman writes about taking responsibility for your life, “It is better for you to take responsibility for your life as it is, instead of blaming others, or circumstances, for your predicament. As your eyes open, you’ll see that your state of health, happiness, and every circumstance of your life has been, in large part, arranged by you – consciously or unconsciously.
“To give and to receive are one in truth.” ~Lesson 108, A Course in Miracles
Have you ever felt exhausted or drained after helping someone? Do you feel chronically overworked and tired? Do you feel resentment after being asked for something? At one point or another, everyone had these feelings. The ability to create a balance of giving and receiving is the key to maintain healthy long-term relationships.
4-Step Process of Restoring the Balance of Giving and Receiving
The process below will help you to determine if you are giving too much, and if yes, to learn how to restore the balance of energy. There are 4 questions we can ask ourselves to begin re-balancing our relationships and money issues.
How Do I Know If I’m Over-Giving?
My definition of giving “too much” is when a person feels depleted or hurts himself in the process of helping someone. Resentment, anger, frustration, or despair are signals that tell me that I’m not paying attention to my own needs and over-giving.
In this article, the author Elizabeth Gilbert clearly explains the difference between over-giving and generosity by saying, “…over-giving is not quite the same thing as generosity. Generosity is neither entangling nor aggressive, because the generous person doesn’t expect anything in return. The over-giver doesn’t expect anything in return either—except to be petted and feted and praised and loved unconditionally for the rest of time…”
Wouldn’t it be nice to be in the state of full acceptance and peace inside, regardless of what happens outside? Is it even possible? This is the state of zero, the state of presence that is full of potential for transformation. In numerology, zero represents the highest degree of acceptance that opens the door to power, fullness, and strength. The strength and power comes from the awareness that you are who you are, regardless of what other people think, say, or do. When we are in this state, we are open to receive insights from our inner wisdom. This state of calm presence transforms our environment, our life, and our world.
“Enlightenment means taking full responsibility for your life.” ~ William Blake
As a spiritual life coach and numerologist, I see that many people struggle with understanding and developing the skill of responsibility. I have made the same mistake early on my spiritual path. In our culture, the true meaning of responsibility is often obscured.
What Is Responsibility?
If you have a number 8 in your birth date, there is a good chance that you are already familiar with the energy of bringing the spiritual and material worlds together inside of you. If you don’t have an 8 in your birth date, it might indicate that you are working on integrating the quality of responsibility in this lifetime. It’s not an easy task, but it can strengthen your potential for growth and fulfillment.
In other words, 8 is the number of power and mastery in material expression that comes from knowing who you are spiritually.
Commitment is severely underrated in our modern society. As a result, the Holy Grail of a wholehearted decision to fully commit to reaching one’s highest potential at all levels is overlooked. Often, we wait for things to work out in our lives without really investing the energy into our own success and well-being. To commit means to believe in yourself and to pursue wholeheartedly what you think is good for you. It is not a “maybe”, but a definite “yes”.
Commitment literally opens the doors and brings clarity and joy into one’s life. There is no more questions that need to be answered, no doubts, and no more convincing left to do. The road ahead is clear, and there are no more obstacles that block the light. At that point, the only option that is available to you is to share that light with the rest of the world. The way you can contribute to the world is maximized.
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